Seeking Instant Happiness? Get Off Social Media | Psychology Today Article
Seeking Instant Happiness? Get Off Social Media
Here are three steps to rid yourself of social media to find true happiness.
Posted December 17, 2023 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader, Written by Nir Bashan
KEY POINTS
Numerous studies have found a strong link between social media use and unhappiness.
Stepping away from social media can be the ultimate act of liberation.
Deleting our social media accounts can allow us to reclaim the creative brilliance that lies dormant.
In an era where our lives are seamlessly intertwined with the virtual tapestry of social media, it's easy to lose sight of the pursuit of genuine offline happiness. We find ourselves amidst a landscape where social media celebrities rival Hollywood's finest, capturing global attention and adoration. Yet, beneath the glitz and glamour lies a paradox—the more time we spend on social media platforms, the more unhappy we seem to be[1].
The promise of a better life, whether it's learning to cook like a Michelin-star chef or fixing a pesky air conditioning unit, dangles enticingly before us on social media. Deals and discounts beckon endlessly, seemingly unbeatable at any brick-and-mortar store. We've fallen headfirst into the captivating allure of digital platforms promising everything from A-list glamour to life-altering hacks. It's a tempting rabbit hole that has consumed us all.
However, it's time to question this mirage, for in the pursuit of an idyllic and often imaginary perfect existence, we often find ourselves drowning in a sea of curated illusions that harm more than help.
To unleash a joy that exists beyond the confines of social media, consider this a wake-up call to delete those social media apps once and for all. It's a bold move that might just be the catalyst for a happiness revolution in your life that is well within your control.
Now, let's delve into the three transformative steps rooted in the Creator Mindset, guiding you to gracefully step away from the social media cesspool to rediscover unbridled and honest offline joy once again.
Step One: Limit Exposure
Getting off social media can be very challenging [2]. The pull is that strong. Too much exposure to social media has been linked to symptoms of depression and low self-esteem and worse[3]. The pull to click here and click there can be so strong that we spend mindless hours clicking, zooming in on pics, hearting, or thumbs-upping posts that we can lose all track of time. We then worry about missing out on the latest or the greatest.
We compulsively click, refresh, or look and see if we got all the latest posts, compare ourselves endlessly to others, seek deals, and the list goes on and on driving us into compulsion rarely experienced in other parts of our lives, starting the vicious cycle anew with just one more click.
Soon, jealousy takes root—a green monster that creeps in as we compare ourselves to others in our digital sphere. From seemingly perfect lives to envy-inducing adventures, the cascade of emotions leads us into a dark abyss of regret, suspicion, and despair[4]. Is it any wonder that our mood often plummets post-social media session[5]?
Rather than opting for the cold turkey approach, consider a gentler path of tapering off. Start by setting limits on your exposure time. Picture this step as perhaps a timer on your phone, a boundary that signals the end of the social media binge.
Begin with a modest 20 minutes and assess if that scratch is enough for the itch. If needed, add five or 10 minutes more, adjusting until you find a balance that feels tolerable. Commit to this gradual detox for a month, and once the once-alluring pull begins to wane with just 20 or 30 minutes of browsing, you'll know you're ready to progress to the next step in my transformative process.
Step Two: Delete the Apps
Now, we're diving headfirst into the heart of the transformation—the commitment to sever ties with the social media apps on your phone or computer. Picture it as a digital declutter, a conscious uncoupling from the captivating allure of constant connectivity. On your desktop or laptop, take the bold step of logging out from those familiar social media haunts that once held you captive.
That’s right: log out.
I won't sugarcoat it; this step is the true crucible of change. Once you've navigated limiting your social media time, you might start feeling like you’ve got it all together. Yet, true mastery and freedom come from a crucial revelation: reclaiming the time squandered on social media by actively engaging by doing other things.
It's a pivotal moment, a crossroads where you must decide what to do with the treasure trove of time you've reclaimed. This is not just about limiting; it's about redirecting that precious, irretrievable resource of time toward something that truly matters to you.
You are literally taking wasted social media time and now applying it to things that really, truly matter to you.
Perhaps it's diving into a long-lost hobby, taking a leisurely walk during a work break, or even relishing the underrated joy of being bored (a secret weapon for creativity—stay tuned for an upcoming post). Reclaiming your life from social media's grasp isn't just about limiting; it's about gifting yourself the miracle of newly created time. That time will allow you to spend it on what you'll likely regret most at the end of your life: and that is not taking enough time to make and keep better relationships with people in your life[6].
Think of it as a gift of freedom you've carved out for yourself, a chance to explore, experiment, and relish in more moments of digital detox healing. Away from social media and into more time being in the moment[7]. It's a remarkable shift that transforms what once felt like lost time into a newfound canvas for your own creation—a true marvel in the art of living beyond the screen.
Step Three: Complete Freedom
As we ascend to the summit of this digital freedom journey, the third step beckons with a resounding call: Delete those accounts entirely and commit to a life beyond social media.
In a world where being off the social media grid seems unfathomable, I stand as one of the unconventional few advocating for the belief that no social media is, indeed, the best social media. This conviction isn't born of mere whimsy; it's the culmination of years immersed in research and study, a wealth of which you'll find nestled in the footnotes of this very article. My stance is clear: social media, with its fleeting advantages, pales in comparison to the myriad ways it can harm us. And furthermore, it can enable security and surveillance threats from some of the most oppressive regimes on earth[8].
Stepping away from social media can be the ultimate act of liberation. Abandoning the digital stage grants us the freedom to reclaim our authentic selves. In a world dominated by constant connectivity and curated personas, withdrawing from the social media spectacle becomes a revolutionary act, allowing individuals to rediscover their intrinsic values, passions and creative potential. In the absence of the constant noise of likes, comments, and comparisons, we can tune into our inner creative rhythm, fostering innovation, authenticity, and a deeper connection with our true selves.
Now here is one of the best parts of quitting social media: The action to consciously avoid social media just may spark a renaissance of original thought. The ceaseless scroll hinders our ability to think beyond the prescribed boundaries of digital algorithms, stifling the very creativity that defines us as human beings. By opting out of the online popularity contest, individuals will cultivate a space where unconventional ideas can flourish, unencumbered by the constraints of conformity. Deleting social media accounts can finally allow us to reclaim our mental bandwidth and the untamed brilliance that lies dormant within each of us.
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The invasion of social media into the fabric of our society has ushered in a host of afflictions, from compromised safety to the erosion of mental well-being. Yet, in the face of its overpowering grip lies the potential for a transformative escape, presenting us with the prospect of a life more profoundly enriched and the gift of long-lost time.
Consider the trio of steps outlined above as a gateway to a fresh start for those yearning to break free from the shackles of oppressive social media. This isn't just a departure; it's a renaissance—a newfound freedom bringing a brighter future to us all. A future adorned with improved mental health, heightened joy, and a more optimistic outlook on life. The journey toward freedom is paved with these deliberate steps above, offering a beacon of hope for those ready to embrace a life beyond social media. One brimming with genuine experiences and authentic connections, unattainable within the confines of social media’s fabrication of reality.
[1] Pantic, I. (2014). Online Social Networking and Mental Health. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking Journal.
[2] Meshi, D. (2019). Excessive social media users demonstrate impaired decision making in the Iowa Gambling Task. Journal of Behavioral Addiction.
[3] Yuhas, D. (2022), Why Social Media Makes People Unhappy and Simple Ways to Fix It. Scientific American.
[4] Enders, A. Et Al.(2023). The Relationship Between Social Media Use and Beliefs in Conspiracy Theories and Misinformation. Journal of Political Behavior
[5] Primack, B. Et Al.(2017). Use of multiple social media platforms and symptoms of depression and anxiety: A nationally-representative study among U.S. young adults. Computers in Human Behavior Volume 69, April 2017, Pages 1-9
[6] Morrison, M., Roese, N.(2011). Regrets of the Typical American: Findings From a Nationally Representative Sample. Social Psychological and Personality Science Volume 2 Issue 6, November 2011.
[7] Kiken, L., Lundberg, K., Fredrickson, B.(2018). Being present and enjoying it: Dispositional mindfulness and savoring the moment are distinct, interactive predictors of positive emotions and psychological health. Interactive Predictors of Positive Emotions and Psychological Health. Mindfulness 8, 1280–1290
[8] Greitens, S. (2022). China’s Surveillance State at Home & Abroad: Challenges for U.S. Policy. Working Paper for the Penn Project on the Future of U.S.-China Relations.